Jill Smolowe is the author of the memoirs Four Funerals and a Wedding: Resilience in a Time of Grief and An Empty Lap, and co-editor of the adoption anthology A Love Like No Other. An award-winning journalist, she has been a foreign affairs writer for Time and Newsweek, and a senior writer for People. Her articles and essays have appeared in the New York Times, the Boston Globe, The Washington Post Magazine, More and many other publications. In her work as a grief and transition coach, Jill partners with clients across the United States via phone and Skype to help them identify—then take—the steps that will restore momentum, purpose and joy to their lives.
What are you reading? What's on your nightstand?
Current: "A Constellation of Vital Phenomena," Anthony Marra
Nightstand: "The Children Act," Ian McEwan and "To Show and To Tell," Phillip Lopate
Where do you go to get inspired?
Boring as this is going to sound, my best place for inspiration is at my desk, in front of my computer screen.
What's something that surprised you recently (in a good way)?
A website I write for on a contract basis gave me an unasked-for raise.
Where do you write?
In my home office.
What/who makes you laugh? Why?
David Sedaris on the page; Ricky Gervais on the TV screen; my slumbering dog on the living room rug, her tongue--literally--hitting the floor.
Favorite fictional character ever?
Elizabeth Bennett
What are you working on?
Mostly essays
"In under a year and a half, Jill Smolowe lost her husband, her mother-in-law, her sister, and her mother. Here she mostly focuses on husband Joe’s diagnosis of cancer, his progress through chemotherapy and remission, and his eventual death. In the process of telling her story of love and loss, she reflects on grief—our narratives about grief, our responses to it, and how we recover. Smolowe cites the work of psychologist George Bonanno extensively, and, in sharing her story, offers thoughtful and compassionate guidance for people going through the grieving process with loved ones. Her story is heartbreaking and heartwarming, incisively written and extremely clear. Readers will find themselves sympathetic and eager to hear how Smolowe coped with her losses and how she negotiated societal expectations of grief with grace and dignity. This is an absolute must-read for people struggling with loss."
—Publishers Weekly
Four Funerals and a Wedding by
In Four Funerals and a Wedding, Smolowe jostles preconceptions about caregiving, defies cliche´s about losing loved ones, and reveals a stunning bottom line: far from being uncommon, resilience like hers is the norm among the recently bereaved. With humor and quiet wisdom, and with a lens firmly trained on what helped her tolerate and rebound from so much sorrow, she offers answers to questions we all confront in the face of loss, and reminds us that grief is not only about endings—it’s about new beginnings.
An Empty Lap by
Perfect for the large number of baby boomers who have delayed starting families and are now running against their biological limits, An Empty Lap recounts the struggle of the author, an award-winning former senior writer for Time, and her husband as they attempt to have a child.
